What I’ve Learned: Thinking About the Future

“Going through amicable divorce is difficult  – no ifs, ands, or buts about it, find the best divorce attorney to help.  Even if things end on the best of terms, you may be left with a sense of loss, failure, or grief.  Unfortunately, it can be quite easy to get lost in those feelings and not move forward into a future that holds a lot of promise for you.  Instead of focusing on the ending, look toward the beginning. What a gift you have been given: the chance to redefine your life and create a future that feels right for you.  I believe that although one door may have closed, others are opening.


This is the time to dream big – why not?  You are an important person and you have control over yourself.  Living in the past is no way to live. Being angry at someone does not hurt them nearly as much as it hurts you.  There are steps you can take to move forward, heal, and create the future you want. First things first, accept that the divorce happened. Allow yourself to grieve if you need to.  Get it all out – you can’t move forward holding on to things from the past. Just don’t stay in the grief too long, and remember to reach out to friends and family.


Be kind to yourself.  Treat yourself to a new look or find a hobby you enjoy. Enlist the services of a personal coach, a personal chef, a physical health expert, or a mental health expert.  Remember to pay attention to what you are telling yourself. Are you being negative or berating yourself? Try to practice gratitude and remind yourself that you are important and wonderful.  Take a solo trip to a place that brings you joy or volunteer your time with a group that you believe in. Live some part of your life in service to something else, something that makes you understand that you are part of the world, but you are not the whole world.  To be the best version of yourself, the best parent you can be, and move forward, you must take care of you!


Set some goals for your future.  These don’t have to be grandiose or complicated – start small and simple.  Focus on the next week, then the month, and go forward from there. Do you want to get more exercise, get out with friends more often, or learn a new skill?  Focus on what brings you happiness and more happiness will follow.


You are responsible for your own happiness.  Happiness is a choice you must make every day.   So choose forward progress over staying stuck in the past and holding on to anger.  Take this for what it is – a learning experience and a chance to create the life you want in the future” (Willoughby).


Willoughby, K. R. Esq., Genesee Living Magazine.

Categories: Exceptional Representation